You didn’t envision homeschooling to be this way. When you withdrew your child from school or decided to kick off the preschool year at home you assumed the hardest part would be choosing the curriculum. Your child was supposed to enjoy every moment of this, to revel in the freedom that homeschooling offers. This was supposed to create a happy and content family where everybody lives in harmony and your child grows to love learning and can’t wait to open that book and learn about something new today.
On the contrary, this may be what’s going on:
This is not working!
My child gets angry when I mention the word lesson or school!
My child tells me that school is boring.
He hates learning!
My child won’t focus!
She refuses to cooperate and do her lessons!
I want to quit!
It wasn’t supposed to be like this!
He refuses to make an effort!
My child is falling behind!
If any of those statements ring true to you and you’re sitting there nodding your head in frustration:
Children are much more resilient than we think. It’s okay to have speed bumps in your homeschool, and your child won’t hold it against you, but it’s NOT okay to keep trying the same routine day after day, hoping that things will just “snap” into place. We all know the definition of insanity right?
Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
If your homeschool is having trouble and everyone is at the end of their rope it’s time to take a step back. Young children do not hide their emotions and if you take a moment to truly ask them why they’re upset with your homeschool believe me, you’ll get an honest answer. As parents it’s hard to accept the reality that things can’t always go as planned.
I know. You spent a lot of money and hours, maybe weeks of preparation putting together that curriculum and you expected it to be exactly what your child needed. Your child may be resisting or straight up refusing to do the work and you’re getting heated.
If there’s anger and tears in your homeschool your child needs a new method.
You need to reboot and start over.
Let’s figure this out step by step. First, ask yourself:
Am I expecting my child to complete too much work?
Are the lessons a little too advanced for my child and he’s frustrated because he’s not getting it?
Is your homeschool too relaxed and permissive so trying to establish a consistent routine is challenging and as a result your child isn’t taking their lessons seriously?
Are you putting too much pressure on your child to do their work and she’s overwhelmed with the process?
If you answered no to the above questions I have the answer for you and it’s something that can cause a lot of issues with homeschooling.
The curriculum you’re using is not centered around your child’s learning style.
Is this the first time you’ve heard that phrase “Learning Style?” Let me explain and very soon you’ll understand the importance of knowing your child’s unique learning style.
Every single person learns best in a certain way. Some are visual learners who learn best by observation, some are linguistic learners and reading aloud or audiobooks may be the best way for them to retain information, others may be kinesthetic or hands on learning through physical activities.
If you don’t know your child’s learning style you’re not armed with all the information you need to make your child’s education fun and engaging. If you’re trying to teach a visual learner by asking her to read various books and answer questions on a worksheet your child will resist. If you’re trying to educate your solitary learner by enrolling him in a large co-op group that’s not going to fare well.
Imagine if you were expected to remember last year’s recipe for turkey brine for thanksgiving by memory but you’re the kind of person who has to write things down. You’d be frantic! You’re not going to remember and come Thanksgiving, you’re not going to feel very good about yourself when everyone is cutting into a dry and bland turkey. It wouldn’t be your fault, remembering the recipe in that particular way was just the wrong method for you.
The most important part of shaping your child’s education to meet their needs and to help them excel in their work is to identify your child’s learning style. You choose the lessons, activities and a curriculum that best suits that particular style of learning.
You should also figure out YOUR learning style. That is going to play a huge role in you and your child getting along. If you both learn in different ways, it’s no wonder you’re all frustrated. You’re trying to teach your child in the best way that YOU learn, not the best way for your child. That’s a one-sided way of teaching and is also the most common issue with public schools. Isn’t that the reason you decided to homeschool? You don’t want your child corralled into a singular method of education? Once you sort out this frustrating issue I promise things will get better in your homeschool.
So now for the obvious question: How do I determine my child’s learning style? Where do I figure out MY learning style?
The quizzes right here on my site is the best way to get started. Take the What’s My Child’s Learning Style quiz to get started. On the results page you’ll be given advice and resources on how to start over and design the best curriculum for your child’s particular learning style. It’s all free and only takes a few minutes. I want your homeschooling experience to be positive and successful and I want to provide you with as much information as I can to ensure that your homeschool will be as efficient, harmonious and successful as possible.
If you want a more in depth analysis of your child’s learning style I’m currently working on a free 5 day e course that will help you develop a customized curriculum based on your child’s individual and unique interests and abilities. Take a second and subscribe so you don’t miss out on this super informative e course when it becomes available!
There is no one size fits all method in education and by homeschooling your child you believe this wholeheartedly. It’s never too late to start over and approach tomorrow with a fresh pair of eyes and ears. Listen with your heart and plan with your mind. Everyday isn’t guaranteed to be a great day, but with a little know all and a lot of love, everything will work out for the best.
Has homeschooling caused frustration and tears in your home? What problems have you encountered and have you solved them? I’d love to hear about it below! Your comments may help another family who’s struggling so please don’t be shy!